Wednesday, September 03, 2008 @9:03 PM
It's like every step accumulating and before you know it, you seem to be at the edge.
Just a light shove will send you spinning out of control and away from it all.
It cannot be the path which is wrong. How can it be.
But what's wrong. Too many trees lining the path, distractions along the way, so much so that the old aligning of steps have gone astray?
It's like a barrier between me and the right path. Leaning against it, I strain to focus more and more energy.
Monday, June 02, 2008 @11:02 PM
Junbin says he's damn bored at home.
@#$%^&&*@$#%
Sunday, May 04, 2008 @3:59 PM
I wonder why I sound so low in self-esteem all the time.
I know it's unintentional
It's kinda like a slow cooker now isn't it. (as much as it's outdated)
All the pressure cooped inside.
So not within my capabilities to help out.
As I've always said. I'm sure it's just a passing phase.
Good times will be back. :)
Don't let me clip your wings
and the freedom to fly
Tuesday, January 29, 2008 @2:55 AM
It's been so damn bloody long ever since I last blogged.
I never thought I would have to blog so soon again. I don't have a clue what this entry is about actually. Maybe I'm tired. Maybe I just cant wait for this week to end. Maybe I'm too impractical and oblivious to what's going on around me.
I think and I realize. The world does continue turning even when my world might have stood still. N one day, it's going to spin me out of control. I actually feel it slow unwinding all which I've done. Slowly slowly slowly. Kinda like how your life is being drained away. With minimal pain that it can actually deal you. Wounds form and heal. On the surface. I feel the scar cracking as the past which I though I've left behind slowly tearing it. N i cant seem to do anything about it. It's a rather nostalgic feeling of helplessness which seems to slowly engulf me. And I had no fricking clue it's actually coming so soon.
The bubble I've created for myself is thinning.
Monday, November 26, 2007 @10:04 PM
How real is it?
It was only yesterday, wasn't it. Sending me the pieces you've composed, teaching me the tricks of getting abs, showing me how true fighting spirit is.
No, but it wasn't yesterday. It was a year ago.
You were one of the true friends I've had on the team and you are gone. So close. So unrealistic. It wasn't supposed to end this way, was it.
All the training, all the hard work, all the sacrifices. N it all ended now? when you are just 23?
I'm 22, dammit. The same thing can happen to me and I wouldn't know.
Living you life to the fullest while you can? How full can a 23-year-old have lived his life.
What do you judge it by. The number of comments on his friendster profile? Bullshit.
Was it all worth fighting for?
Death came knocking early and answered the question, hasn't it.
People are enjoying their lives. Living whatever trivial dreams they have and yours? gone down the murky Cambodian river. Fuck.
Fuck fuck fuck.
Fuck it man. You are still on my fucking msn. But you are GONE. Just like that!
So what am I supposed to do with you on my msn contact list? Delete it and let it disappear as how memories of you will slowly fade away? Dammit!
Reuben. One year on but only now I miss the buddy I had during those days.
Sunday, November 18, 2007 @10:21 PM
After sheesh-I-have-no-idea how long, Junbin is happy! hahaha..
Like such exhilarating happiness when it's actually nothing much. But still, I finally see some light! hahaha.. some direction if you want to put it that way.
Well, Ok, I know. This is damn weird 'coz I've yet to even mention what I'm happy about... but... it's a long story! :D Not the right time too! :D
Can somebody bring me back down to earth please?
Ok, haha. I just crashed back into the ground - 0017hrs
Monday, November 12, 2007 @1:43 AM
I'm amused.
Nothing's changed. really.
You said it felt like old times. Somehow my eyes got fixed at the word "old"
Funny how the first thing that got planted when I came back was this very catchy song, catchy yet full of a careless, hopeless form of exasperation.
"This is the way you left me,
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory
No Happy Ending
This is the way that we love
like it's forever
Let's live the rest of our life
But not together"